How can you tell if your dating a sociopath
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12 Signs You’re Dating A Sociopath
At the prevalence of who we are as gay men, we tend to and people who still us. Fun and charming For the right, thing is everything. Overtly they lose their singles, or have a year of trouble in the story.
If I can help at all, I want to make sure that other people do not go through the pain and devastation that I did. And if they have already done so, I hope they will come out the other side with me, knowing that they were not alone and that they have now truly stepped into the light to be rid of these people. They are intense and fast-moving. We meet someone and you just know. Everything seems to make sense. Whoa, slow down there! Sociopaths like to take up your world, and they can do this by committing really quickly. We, of course, may take this as a sign of Disney-like love that we hoped existed somewhere, out there, for us….
It is such an ego boost for the sociopath to feel as if they are indispensable in your life. When they have found someone they can manipulate easily, they will be loath to let you go. The easiest way to trap you in their web is to commit to you and get you feel all your good feelings toward them, investing in what you believe to be genuine affection. All very sweet phrases. They need to control. The sociopath may fake being a laid-back person frighteningly well, but trust me, nothing could be further from the truth. Their need to dominate their surroundings, their relationships, their home lives, their circle of friends—everything that they feel capable of dominating in, they will.
If they feel they cannot impress or will not be the best at something in a certain circumstance, they will likely avoid that altogether. One of my exes claimed social anxiety; what this meant was that he knew others were doing better than him or were more confident than him, so he would avoid anything that would make him feel like he was not the best in a social circle; he avoided prolonged interaction with others because it made him feel bad. They want to spend all that lovely free time with you. Get rid of them, please? Their ego needs to be massaged.
If it starts to feel a little overboard however… 4. They will criticize you, subtly or otherwise. As long as there is someone around to make them feel good, they are content. If you are falling over yourself to tell them how much they are loved all the time, you should be fine. Or how you raise your kids. Or even how you do your hair. But it takes the focus off them if they can accuse somebody else of it. They may also accuse you of doing things they themselves are guilty of. If they drink too much, they may accuse you of the same, or tell you your life is about to fall apart because of one of your supposed bad habits.
They cannot deal with it. Huge warning flag here. The stories always sound plausible enough. I gave them everything. I did this, that, supported, loved, blah blah blah. Note that they will often not talk too much about the emotion they felt for their exes. Essentially, they had a great relationship, but then the other person buggered it up. It was their fault. They took all the good things that they did for that person and disregarded it. The image that comes to mind here is of a person acting crushed, peering out at you between their fingers to see if you have fallen for it.
When every one of their stories is like that, there are two possibilities. Either this person has the worst taste in partners possible, or you are not being told the whole truth. With sociopaths, it is the latter. They make false empty promises, waste your time, and say things that they have no intention of ever coming true. Or maybe you met online. There are no lifelong friends, no family members who come to visit. After a while you will ask, but he will make excuses. Because of this, at first, you do not notice this lack of connections from his past. It is as the relationship progresses, and after you have introduced him to everyone that is close to you, you start to wonder, when you will meet people that he is close to?
Huge ego All sociopaths are narcissists, but not all narcissists are sociopaths. Because of this, all sociopaths have a huge ego. When you meet, they will tell you a huge list of things that make them sound absolutely remarkable.
They will talk of big business plans, success that they have had in the past. How in demand they are with the opposite sex but how they have chosen you, because you are special. They will talk of incredible success with careers. And most definitely brag of how amazingly skilled they are in bed. They will sell themselves to you, like a top notch car salesman selling his cars on the parking lot. He will not care that everything told to you is a lie. He creates a wonderful fantasy of himself. Designed to ensnare and impress you.
He will make you feel how lucky you are to have met someone as amazing as his smooth dazzling self. They play victim Of course, if the only part of his persona that you saw was his ego, it would be quite off putting. After all, nobody likes a show off. It is therefore important to the sociopath to play victim. He will tell tales of how awful his childhood was. How he was treated badly by his exes. What a wonderful caring person he is. He will make up incredible stories, designed to evoke pity and sympathy. If he is almost caught in a lie, he will try to deflect attention from this, and try to m